It is what it is is what it is.
Frankly, life since my injury has been a lot like the sentence above; convoluted, cumbersome, and, in the end, it is what it is, part of life. It’s convoluted because every part of life, from mundane tasks to playing sports, are made that much more difficult, and since almost everything is like that, it can easily be annoying, if you let it. For example, since my brain injury, although it has improved immeasurably (and continues to improve), my posture, especially when sitting, isn’t great for my back, making it difficult to get comfortable, sitting, standing, or lying down to sleep. It’s cumbersome because the left side of my body doesn’t act as naturally as the right side, making it very difficult to climb or descend stairs without a rail on my right side. Ascending and descending is a problem due to my double vision. I don’t know what else to say about my double vision, other than it seems to be the villainous mastermind behind many of the problems I’ve experienced in these past 10 years. It’s why I have such difficulty catching a water polo ball (or any other ball for that matter), it’s the main reason descending stairs is much more difficult than ascending, and I’m pretty sure my balance and walking would be much better off without this damned double vision, but there it is.
It sucks, but it’s part of life. It’s not part of everybody’s life, but is part of mine. I’ve done a lot of thinking these past 10 years. Probably too much thinking. The most important thing I’ve learned thus far – ask me in another 10 years and it could very well be different -is that it is what it is. In no way, does that mean give up, you can’t do anything. Just the opposite. It means ‘get on with it’. Posture, balance, walking, swimming, they didn’t just happen after my brain injury. It took enormous amounts of hard work and they are still nowhere near where I’d like them to be, even after 10 years. It’s tough, and it takes a long time, but accepting that you may have a long recovery ahead of you (not weeks or months, but years) is so important to feeling good about yourself and realizing that shit happens all the time, there’s no point dwelling on it. Much like that opening sentence, immediately it may not make sense, it’s difficult to follow, but if you just look at it for what it is, you can make sense out of it.